You're So Vein

               Well, maybe you’re not vain…but in all honesty, I am.  Pregnancy has a way of humbling many of us though.  It doesn’t really bother me to watch my stomach to expand to several times its normal size, but there are other things that happen during pregnancy that are not so thrilling for me.  During every pregnancy one of my legs gets a horrible case of spider veins accompanied by a couple distended varicose veins.  (just one leg, mind you—which makes it look even freakier!)   I get used to looking at it; but honestly, I do cringe when one of my girls cry out in disgust, “Mommy, what happened to your leg!”  I usually just explain that this is what happens for me every time I get pregnant.  It goes away within a few weeks of pregnancy; and thankfully for my vanity’s sake, I’ve been pregnant for the majority of the past three pregnancies during the cold winter months.  Pants and jeans allow me to forgo all the questions and looks most people would give me.  A couple of weeks ago, a friend at a playgroup explained that this also happened to her during each pregnancy.  After her fifth baby though, they never went away.   I had a small moment of panic…this is my fifth baby.  Maybe my veins will not disappear like before.  Unlike stretch marks that I could conceal with a one piece swimsuit, there is not much hope for me at the pool during the hot summer months (unless I want to consider a deep sea diver suit).

                You may wonder why I’m sharing this with you.  This was part of today’s  “No More Perfect Moms” challenge (If you still haven’t signed up and you want to, you can do so by clicking here.) Some of you can relate; and those of you yet to experience the joys and woes of child-bearing, may breathe a sigh of relief when you do end up watching your body go through “normal” changes that feel very abnormal.  I love what Jill Savage says when she writes, “Take off the mask of pride today.  You’ll be doing yourself and the moms in your mothering community a huge favor.  When pride is removed, honesty happens.  Then you will discover that your honest will be a catalyst for someone else’s honesty and change might also take place in other moms’ lives.”   She goes on to share her own lack of perfection (including her “post-baby bump”) in her chapter about no more perfect bodies, which is such nice breath of fresh air. More than just helping you feel normal, the biggest reason for me to embrace the changes I’m going through without horror is that I have four little girls watching my every move and reaction.  Body image is something I’ve always struggled with, and I know my mom has as well.  Whenever we get together, she inadvertently talks about her weight…whether it is apologizing for it being too much, or bemoaning how thin and fatigued she feels.  It has gotten to the point that I have to ask her to stop because I don’t want my girls to have an unhealthy obsession with their weight.  She does it without even thinking, and  I know it is something that must weigh on her mind a lot.  I want to try to be healthy…however, I want my girls to know that it is normal as I age to get more “liver” spots, and wrinkles.  I want them to hear about the wonderful things about carrying babies, not just about how they stretched my body out or gave me huge veins (in one leg).  There are some things you cannot control.  God loves me just the way I am, and I want them to know He loves them just the same.