Building a Web

          "How long will it be till I find someone else that likes running?" I asked God this during my morning conversation, but it was more in resignation than a request.  With five kids, I have a hard time keeping my attention focused on a conversation with another adult long enough to know somebody beyond their name let alone their hobbies. I had talked about running with a kind soul at the original church we had attended when we first moved to Missouri (note that this was only possible because four of my five kids were in the children's church). For many reasons, we decided to check out another church a couple of months ago, leaving behind my running connection. I haven't found another nursing room there, let alone another nursing room buddy...but God is not deterred by minor things like my ideas of how something should happen.  A couple hours after that conversation with God, we were at the local library for story time. A mom that I had met the week before at the library started talking to me about running; and before I knew it, Mary and I signed up for our very first 5K (which'll be coming up in just a few weeks). I could easily imagine God chuckling at my surprise. That was really quick answer to pray.
            The thing that has been hardest about moving is leaving behind the support network of moms and families we had in Illinois.  In December,  I remember being sad that the children were still feeling disconnected from having real "friends". I felt a pang of responsibility and guilt. Maybe I made a mistake by continuing to homeschool them. It was hard to have priorities beyond school and unpacking for me this fall. I wanted to feel at home in our home before having people over, but there was a depressive gloom on our girl's faces, especially the older ones. What's a mom to do? Well, I said yes to every e-vite for the monthly homeschooler field trip. I also decided to join a homeschool co-op.  I've never been against co-ops. I just don't like to commit to someone else's schedule (and try to get everyone somewhere on time and prepared with homework and such). I like the flexibility of taking a week off anytime I want and being done as early as May. God heard my cry and protestations. I just happened to show up at AWANA early for pick-up, just happened to meet with a homeschooling mom who hooked me up with one of the founders of a wonderful co-op that has 12 week semester (thus relieving some of my issues with commitment). It has been one of the best experiences of my short teaching career. We've made friends and had playdates, besides being challenged to be a better teacher (like learning what sensory bins are and how to incorporate them...currently Mr. Blue Eyes loves his morning "sensory bin"--our dog's food tub).
           God hasn't stopped with helping me build my "web" of friends.  He's placed two other friends (that also happen to homeschool) in my path that have no connection to the co-op or library time or AWANA. Both of them have their own areas of expertise,  and I've really loved getting to know them better. Sometimes it's hard for me to wait for God's answer to my prayers.  Sometimes I am tempted to think He isn't listening at all, but looking back I am grateful for the timing. Do you really appreciate something unless you truly feel the loss? When I recently read the account of a cripple being healed by Peter and John in Acts 3-4, I was suprised when I read Acts 4:22. It says, "For the man on whom this sign (miracle) of healing was performed was more than forty years old." I wondered what it would feel like to wait more than forty years for my answer to come. He'd been crippled since birth (Acts 3:2). Surely his mom prayed for healing while she cradled him in her arms for the first time or when she realized that he was different from the other children. I imagine his mother was truly grateful for his healing after watching him struggle for so long. The crippled man must have felt happy as well.
            A friend recently asked how I knew different people and had found some connections for various homeschool opportunities after just living here since September.  Later, I realized it was because God had blessed me with placing people right where I could meet them. That's truly an answer to my prayers and an answer to many of your prayers that have come alongside me in the past few months. I was so thankful for all of you who contacted me after my posting about our sickness, offering to pray for us. It connected me to you. It prompted me to start asking others how I could pray for them, which connected me to them. Today, I'm so thankful for the web of support and especially for the One who built it for me.

Gluten-Free Humble Cake

          As my new friend drove up to our house for our first playdate,  I was tempted to throw the crumbly failure into the compost bucket and let the chickens enjoy it. What started as a simple attempt to do something kind for a friend that suspected gluten sensitivities threatened to turn into a humiliating moment for me. I am not a master chef or anything,  but I consider myself a decent baker (let's not talk about the time I made the healthiest pumpkin pie ever--I forgot the sugar). I LOVE baking! Just take one look at my flourless chocolate cake, and you can see it was a flop. My nursing-room buddy from church was coming over to our house and had let me know that her daughter was celebrating a birthday. She also shared that they were looking at going gluten-free because of some health issues with her kids. 

           I thought this would be the perfect chance to try a recipe for "Flourless Chocolate Cake". She told me not to go to any trouble; but since Mr. Blue Eyes woke up when it was time to run that morning, I decided to try.  The recipe called for a spring-form pan, but I don't have one. I was inspired in the middle of the night to use my flan pans, and I decided it would be perfect! Surely, it was God who brought this to mind, so I could make the perfect cake to go along with the perfect friendship. I could fill the little well on top with freshly whipped cream and maybe use a cherry or strawberry for garnish. As I scraped the cake out of the cooled flan pan, I remembered something about parchment paper...apparantly it was more important than I remembered. 

          Little Carrie let out an empathetic "Aww!" when she saw how disappointed I was. Then, I took a deep breath, said a prayer, and did something I never do...I tasted my flopped cake attempt. My mom is forever telling me not to worry about what something looks like. She says, "If it tastes good, who cares?" Well, things like my pride do. I tasted a crumb and then another. It tasted really good. Even Carrie and Grace were asking for more. I decided to serve it despite the appearances. 

           I am forever struggling with remembering that my worth is not defined by my performance or my appearnce,  but only by what God thinks of me. If I learned anything from Jill Savage's book "No More Perfect Moms", it was that being real and flawed was the way to a more authentic and happy existence.  It paves the way for others to relax and let go of their "perfection infection" as Jill puts it. (Did you know she is coming out with a new book called "No More Perfect Kids" co-authored by Kathy Koch? Guess who's on the launch team, reading a sneak preview right now??) I'd thought of the book a lot and it's advice on choosing to take the first step towards other moms and being a "there you are person" instead of waiting for someone else to make the first step. Last week, I copied and put all my favorite gluten-free recipes in a binder for my new friend. I've had dear friends in the past who've changed their lifestyles for allergies and sensitivities,  and I've seen how overwhelming it can be to get started. I thought this could help my new friend, but maybe I'd look a little over eager for friendship. I took a chance at looking dumb, and she said she really liked it. She asked Mary if she knew "How cool your mom is?" Thankfully, Mary just smiled instead of contradicting her.

           We had an awesome playdate. Everyone really liked the cake, including the birthday girl (who talked her reluctant little sister into trying some). Click here for the recipe in case you want to try it (and own a spring-form pan). I thought my friend would leave around eleven thirty, but instead we chatted so much that they stayed well past one. I found out that we have lots to talk about, like essential oils and homeschooling.

Maybe God had given me the idea for the flan pan...to give me a slice of humble pie (cake)...and the gift of an authentic friendship. 

What's your favorite gluten-free recipe or web-site? I'd love to pass it on to my friend!

Breaking the Ice for "Neiiigh"bors

          Eventually,  Eagle's owner declined our offer to take on their horse and took him home.his last week,  we had the pleasure of meeting a couple more of our neighbors due to the escape of a couple of animals: Harley and Eagle. Harley d enjoyed the freedom of our front yard and much of the backyard till he decided to take a stroll onto the side road and into our neighbor's yard. They detained him in a fenced area till we could bring him home. If I hadn't been so frustrated with him at the time, I would've probably laughed. He danced back and forth just out of their reach. Harley will not let himself be touched by a strang.we found this out a couple of years ago when he pursued a cat onto a major highway but evaded any would-be rescuers. After introductions with our neighbor, Harley was put in doggy time out and has since been confined to a generous chain-link fenced area behind our house. He still looks with longing at the ducks and chicken area that he used to run free in. He's still in the doghouse as far as I'm concerned though.
          The second animal capture of the week was a little bigger deal as it involved a larger animal: a horse. When we first moved in, two horses lived in our east pasture area. The owners were busy preparing a permanent space on their land for them, and we patiently waited. After all, the owners just live across the road and two houses down. We wanted to be neighborly. Eventually as it became cold, Charles asked them to kindly collect their animals. Keeping drinkable water for our current pets is more than enough of a challenge for us right now. The horses were collected just before Thanksgiving. Last week,  their horse, Eagle, escaped. Its comrade Ray is in horse rehab, and he must've decided to look for him back at the old stomping grounds. A different neighbor brought him off the road to our fenced in area, concerned that he might get hurt and was unsure if we were keeping the horse for the owner or not. Charles contacted the owner; and after a couple of days of waiting,  we began toying with the idea of keeping him. Clearly the current owner is rather busy, or else the horse would've been collected sooner. Later, we found out he was busy constructing a lean-to. The idea of having a horse had begun to grow on me, as we went out several times a day to break the ice that had formed in the Rubbermaid bin (that held his water temporarily). I've learned that I get attached to animals very easily,  so I never really talked to our guest until we considered keeping him. I know very little about horses; but since another neighbor has grown up caring for horses all her life, I spent some time chatting with her about what we had offered to take on. I found out just how much these neighbors had been watching me. The horse owning neighbor had even noticed the way Eagle and Ray had been eating the bale of hay that a friend had put into their enclosure for us. Being around her reminded me to pay close attention to my words. I have a brand new start here with new people, but just a few words can sour the whole thing. This morning's devotional from "Whispers of Hope" included this scripture: "The words of a whisperer or slanderer are like dainty morsels or words of sport [to some, but to others are like deadly wounds]; and they go down into the innermost parts of the body [or a victim's nature]." (Prov. 26:22-Amplified Version) I need to watch what I say...a LOT!

         Animals take a lot of care and attention; but if it weren't for the two escapees, I may have still been in the dark about our animal lovin' neighbors. Is this part of why God put them on our planet? Are animals the ultimate icebreaker? Eventually, Eagle's owner turned us down and collected their horse. I don't see a ranch anytime in our near future,  but I will continue to break the ice with our animal loving neighbors...maybe instead of Christmas cookies, I'll take over some homemade treats for their animals.

           How are you breaking the ice this holiday season?  Are you like me, in need of a little lip-guarding? Let me know and we can pray for each other, for boldness sprinkled with kindness.

Hunting (Hitting) Deer and Coming Out of Our Shell

           I've heard a lot about the "deer in the headliht" look over the years, but I experienced it firsthand last week.  On Thanksgiving Eve, I had just come over a hill when I saw a deer in the middle of the road.  I tried to slow down and yelled in my head for it to get out of the way. It made it a couple feet directly into my lane before turning and staring at me. I couldn't believe it just stood there and looked at me. It could have run back and forth accross the road at least a couple of times in the time it took me to come up to it. My last thought before I hit it was, "God help me!" I could just see the deer  bouncing onto our windshield and shattering my visibility, causing me to carene into the ditch beside us and flip the van. My thoughts get pretty elaborate. Instead, I hit the deer squarely,  watched it bounce forward into the ditch and try to scramble to its feet. I pulled off, put my hazards on, and was determined to see if the deer was seriously hurt. I saw the deer behind me sitting on the road and amazingly enough very little damage had been done to the van. There wasn't any blood, but what appeared to be excrement.  Poor thing! I scared the poop out of it. It quickly hobbled back into the woods. When I got back in the van, my neice (who had joined us for a sleepover) kept exclaiming that I had knocked one of its legs off. I got out again to search for its amputated limb, but there was nary a leg in sight. I was hoping that if the deer was hurt badly that Charles could come put it out of its misery, and we could have some deer meat to boot. I wouldn't want to waste a deer. Charles joked with me the next day about "hunting" for deer with the van.  When we went to my brother's for Thanksgiving,  we had a lot to be thankful for. We also laughed so much and so hard (mainly over an app called "Elf Yourself" that my neice used with our nine month old), that my abs hurt for two days.
          As I shared a little over a week ago,  I was praying for friends and to make some new ones. Well, God heard my prayers and brought me a whole week of blessings. I found out I won a book (by Beth Moore!) giveaway on one of my favorite blogs (Pruning Princesses). I had met the author when we both helped launch "No More Perfect Moms". The next day, I was so encouraged by another good friend's blog about the rough day she had (another favorite: By Prayer and Petition). Then on Sunday, I made a new friend who just moved to the area...and just started homeschooling (and has three children with ages around my three youngest). I've made several friends in the nursing room at our church. Does rocking and feeding bond you to other people besides your babies? I'm beginning to think it does.
          More sea monkeys are hatching, and the ducklings have been moved to our garage. The final egg failed to pip, but we are grateful for the nine that did hatch. The oldest are beginning to get poky feathers,  and hopefully in another month or so they can free range like the rest of our fowl.
          Charles helped hang a lot of things (like curtains) over the Thanksgiving break. We also rearranged some furniture,  causing one wall's imperfections to be exposed. As Charles was pointing out all the holes left in the wall from the previous owner, the girls chimed in the there was a "pip in the wall! Something is trying to break out!" It really did look like the duck eggs had. We all had a good chuckle over that; but I do think that our life is beginning to emerge here, although we might not be completely out of our shell yet.