Extra-Sharp White Cheddar Woes

        I really love Mac 'N Cheese. A few months ago, I read the ingredients in the Velveeta I had been using to make my "homemade" version and I was seriously grossed out by some of the ingredients (mmm...want some alginate in your cheese? Oh wait! Should I call it cheese? Cheese culture is the last ingredient!?) and also by the fact that it can safely sit at room temperature for months at a time.  I haven't wanted to buy the non-refrigerated Kraft Parmesan cheese for the same reason. Highly processed things just don't seem to be very healthy to consume on a weekly basis.
        I still love Mac 'N Cheese though, so I've been enjoying the occasional bowl from Panera. It tastes out of this world (and realistically may have other unhealthy items in it, but I'm hopeful that it's a step above Velveeta). Since I'm already up several times a night nursing a newborn, I entertained myself earlier this week by looking online for a recipe like Panera's. Despite boycotting Velveeta, I've still been trying desperately to find a tasty version that uses actual cheese. The only thing I've succeeded in is finding a bunch of recipes I don't like (and finally concluding that I don't like baked versions at all). I was thrilled this past Sunday when I found the recipe for Mac 'N Cheese on-line on Panera's own website. On Monday,  I went to Walmart to purchase what I'd need. They didn't have extra-sharp white cheddar cheese, but I thought I'd just substitute with the orange sharp cheddar cheese (the recipe also called for white american cheese, but I substituted the orange for that too). When I told my hubby about my supper plans, he warned that it wouldn't be the same without the white cheddar...but I assured him that other reviewers insisted that the orange worked just as well. I hate to admit it, but my hubby was right. Everyone ate it (with a good deal of ketchup), but it was a huge disappointment to me. I thought I was having all-you-can-eat "Ultimate Mac 'N Cheese".  Did Panera alter the recipe, so I'd be back for the real deal?
        That's the way it is in real life too. There is just no substitute for some things. We've all seen people with a pasted on smile just for show. This past Thursday I took our 3 week old son in for his newborn hearing screening at the local hospital (since he was born at home and hadn't had it tested yet). I was struck by the fake smiles pasted on the workers there. Most of them acted preoccupied and disinterested in really helping you, despite the grin they were sporting. In light if my most recent desire to really love my children despite their annoying whining or impatience, I was struck by John 15:11-12, which shows a connection between joy and love. We are commanded to love each other as Christ has loved us, and the result of following this command is "that our joy may be full". Loving those around me unconditionally will bring me joy. I'm choosing this day to love. I may need to quote this verse out loud a few times, but there'll be no substitution here...just the real deal.
So who out there knows where I can get some really great extra-sharp white cheddar cheese?