I love to read, and I'm getting to explore that even more now that my kids are into books beyond picture driven ones. The most recent series that I've delved into is the "Percy Jackson" series (I really have a huge list to pick from after all the Facebook chatter from this post.) If you're familiar with them, you know that they are based on Greek mythology and that the main character's father is Poseidon...the mythological "god of the sea". I've enjoyed the series and just finished reading the fourth book in the "Heroes of Olympus" series (which I was slightly disappointed with because of views expressed on a couple of topics, but I am looking at it as an opportunity for dialogue about personal beliefs vs. author beliefs). Half-pint LOVES this series, and I have had to put some serious effort into staying ahead of her. After all, I'm the one who borrowed them from the library. I should get to read them first. I am also previewing Jill Savage and Kathy Koch's new book "No More Perfect Kids", which makes for an interesting contrast between fiction for kids and non-fiction about kids. Everytime I turn around, Half-pint has her nose in the next book. She can be quiet on the couch for hours just reading. I have to admit I'm a touch jealous. I get about ten uninterrupted seconds during the day. Ok. That's a slight exaggeration. However, I did have to literally lock myself in the bathroom one afternoon for five minutes, so I could could coherently introduce myself to the launch team for Jill and Kathy's book (after two failed attempts in the kitchen with children swirling around my legs and clinging to arms).
One of the best things about the Percy Jackson series is seeing which "god" each character has as their mother or father. Over the course of the book, you watch the characters discover what powers they have as a result of their "parentage". We were sitting in church a couple of weeks ago, listening to a series on spiritual gifts, when I realized what a perfect intro these books could serve to this topic for them. I asked the girls if they'd ever thought about how they are a child of the one, true God. Just like the characters from these books, they're endowed with gifts from the Holy Spirit when they accept Jesus into their hearts (see 1 Cor. 12:7-11, Romans 12:3-8, and 1 Pet. 4:9-11). When I was young, my parents gave me a test that help me see what gifts I had been given; so I contacted the church we've been attending to see if they had something similar for the girls to take. I read in the book "The Treasure Principle" by Pam Farrell that taking a spiritual gift test around the age of 8 or 9 is great because that's typically an age where we are more "ourselves" and less influenced by others. This has been on my to-do list for a while (Mary, age 11, was four when I read this book). The girls took the test today and were all smiles with the results. (Let me know in the comments below, or e-mail me if you'd like the test we used.)
One of my favorite chapters so far from the other book I'm reading ("No More Perfect Kids") is entitled "Who Am I?"- one of the main questions all kids ask themselves (along with every other adult on the planet). It talks about how we can be identified by what we do (like our interests or scholastic achievements) or who we are. I love the idea it gives for affirming you child using a three pronged approach. First, you identify the good quality and share this with your child. Next, you give an example of when you saw them displaying this quality. Finally, you tell them why this is important. I've used this technique several times this past week on each of our kids (except for Mr. Blue Eyes...one year olds hardly stay still long enough to read a book let alone listen to an affirmation), and they really have responded to it.
Here's how it played out yesterday with Half-pint: I told her 1) how I noticed that she was hard-working and showed initiative 2) specifically when I asked for help loading the recyclables in the van. She had a positive up-beat attitude and didn't complain that she was doing more work than her siblings (even though she ended up making more trips than her sister), and she even thought ahead to run down our lane and open the gate. I had asked for her help, so we could get to story time at the library in time. Opening the gate let us exit the property more efficiently (and we were on time for the FIRST time!). I told her 3) this is important because when she gets older her employer or family will appreciate having someone they can depend on to get the job done and to go the extra mile. A strong work ethic is a great asset to any job.
I could tell she was really listening to me when I complimented her because when we left the house later in the day (this time for AWANA) she ran all the way down the lane to open the gate for me again without any request from me. The three pronged affirmation worked with my three year old just as well. Her big, brown eyes twinkled when I complimented her on the way she quickly responded to my request this past week. I told it's important to know I can count on her to listen and obey.
Does this technique work for adults too? I like your enthusiasm to help your kids by considering buying "No More Perfect Kids", but also the patient way you're waiting for the release. This is important because if you wait to purchase it the week of March 14, you'll get $100 worth of freebies. How'd I do?
In the meantime, try some affirmations and consider giving your kids a test they can pass, helping them realize who they really are: A uniquely gifted child of the "One, True King"...which is way better than being a son of Poseidon.
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