Old-Fashioned

          Being nearly thirteen isn't easy for anyone, but it's interesting to be on the other side as a parent. I remember feeling like the oddball (because of my clothes, my parent's beliefs, the absence of my dad, etc.). For a long time, I believed I was the only one.
          Mary went away with 400 other middle-schoolers to the mountains of Colorado last weekend.  She had a great time, but she is noticing the differences between herself and others. She loves to read and knit (and read about knitting). She loves acting. She loves trying out new hairstyles (she spends lots of time watching and memorizing hairstyles from www.cutegirlhairstyles.com). I think that's amazing and awesome that she loves those things, but also that she knows that about herself. She professes that she is "old-fashioned"...mainly because she owns neither an iPad (or iPod), smart phone or even a Kindle. I know she is convinced that she is the only 12 year old on the planet that doesn't own those things, but I know there are other weirdos like me out there that believe she doesn't need any of those things...at 12. Before you freak out for my technologically-deprived child, let me also point out that she has access to a family phone, my smart phone, a family epad,  and a laptop/computer (we don't really have iAnything because we are more of a PC family).
           On her trip, she asked others if they like some of the books she likes; and they quipped that they "don't read".  Apparently,  they just read their text messages that they were sending back and forth on the charter bus to Colorado.  They did enjoy the girl scout cookies that Charles sent along with her though. She did get to know some of the girls, but there wasn't really any deep connections made with any of them. She said she feels like Steve Rogers (Captain America) in a Tony Stark (Iron Man) world.
           While I was running today, I was inspired to give her an essay assignment: "Why does Captain America lead the Avengers?" He's not the smartest or the strongest...and certainly not the most technologically advanced.  I'm hoping she will focus in on why he is a good leader,  why everyone listens to him, and why he is important to the team...even though he's old-fashioned.  He's got heart, integrity,  and compassion- things that Mary possess too. I want her to make this connection and understand her value in this world is not based on the technology she owns.
            When Mary and I went to Winter Jam, we bought CD's and one of my favorite songs is by Francesca Batistelli:
"Unusual". Take a listen...and give me another idea for her next essay while your at it.

Tying Up Loose Ends

           This week marked a milestone for me. I finally completed a project that I've been working on for 10 years. What could be so hard you may ask? Knitting a blanket for my hubby, Charles. In an effort to be a sweet wifey, I had searched high and low for a blanket that would be long enough (hubby is 6'1") and soft enough to love. I failed miserably at that endeavor. When my firstborn was 15 months old and I was prego again, I took up knitting.  I decided to combine my newfound craftiness (craziness) to solve my quest for the elusive blanket.  I had no idea how long it takes to knit a blanket, but I cheerfully threw myself into making a patchwork blanket. The difficulty level was "easy", but do you have any idea how long it takes to knit 4" squares for a 6' x4' blanket? No? Well clearly I don't either because I never finished it. I decided to try a different approach to the blanket, when I learned arm knitting this spring. I went to a social event with Mary at the local Michael's,  and the lightbulb in my head went on while we learned to use our arms for the knitting needles. Lots of thick yarn (which has been staring at me for eternity) plus arm knitting equals sweet blanket in a matter of days, not months. I've been told that you can find lots of videos for learning to "arm knit" on YouTube; but if you want, just come over and I'll show you how. I used four balls of yarn, and knitted four strands at a time (yes, that adds up to 16 skeins of extra bulky yarn...cast on 32 stitches for a blanket width). I presented it to my hubby on his birthday this week, and he told me how nice it was. He didn't even mention my failure to stick to my original pattern...maybe because he enjoys creative problem solving (he has a degree in engineering, you know).
           The week also marks when my last child made it to the 1,000 hours of school mark. Mama is singing "Hallelujah"! No more counting hours! Half-pint's love of Percy Jackson books helped her finish a couple of weeks ago. We made it to the 600 core hour mark by the end of April, so for the last month we have been doing my version of easy homeschooling: finishing up math and grammar. We threw in some chapters from History (that I don't feel HAS to be finished) and "Five Children and It" for fun. We'll continue our reading program through the summer for our youngest two (Gracie decided to start reading this year at the ripe age of three and a half.)  We'll probably throw in some history projects for everyone too (do you know how close we are to some major historic sites...ever heard of Lewis and Clark or the Pony Express??). There are just five lessons of math left for each girl and Half-pint has a few pages left of grammar to finish. This last week looks like it'll be our last, which has the girls cheering for the last day of school. We usually end the school year with a fabulous excursion to somewhere educational. Legoland might be in our near future.
           It's nice to feel like we are wrapping things up and tying some final strings together, but summer brings with it a whole new set of adventures (or burdens,  depending on how you look at weeds). I read a blog this morning about "Why Mother's Day Is Just Really for the Birds" and I loved the reality it layed down about the never-ending imperfect job of mothering. Ann writes that all the tough things in our lives wear down our exterior shell to make us really authentic--like velveteen rabbits or velveteen mothers, in our case. For the past 6 1/2 years, I have daily prayed for God to transform me into who He wants me to be. I do believe the challenges and the struggles I've gone through have been His work into shaping me, and He is not done by a long shot. Philippians 1:6 says, "And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns." I'm resting on that promise. This velveteen mommy will be enjoying this Mother's Day with the five little gifts that making life interesting and exhausting...snuggled up under a new blanket with my partner in this crazy adventure we have undertaken...thankful to the one who has made this life possible and beautiful.

What are you tying up this week?

In Pursuit of Excellence

            I was a little taken back when my daughter finally spewed out what had been stuck in her craw. "You want me to be perfect!" I had no idea this was what was making her so frustrated in her schoolwork. As a homeschooler, the concept of mastery is always a priority to me. After all, I don't want someone showing up to tell me that I'm hurting our children by not making sure they know their x 3's facts well enough (or that they don't know the words to our national anthem). My daughter had translated my desire for "mastery" into a belief that I expected "perfection". I asked her why she thought I wanted her "to be perfect", and she went on to talk about the remediation process I use (if she gets problems wrong, I go back over them with her to make sure she understands why it is wrong and the correct way to do things). I explained that I just wanted to make sure that she understood the concept, but I acknowledged her feeling pressured by me and apologized. Maybe I was guilty of over going through every problem that was wrong, instead of just looking for a pattern in what was wrong. I feel pressure myself and that had translated to her feeling pressure too.
           "Practice makes perfect." I've said that phrase a lot, but I believe what I long for is excellence.  Jill and Kathy do a great job of outlining the difference in their new book coming out today, "No More Perfect Kids". Here are a couple differences that I really liked: "Excellence is something done well. Perfection is something done without fault. Excellence is attainable. Perfection in unattainable. Excellence allows for failure. Perfection punishes failures." If I hadn't been reading this book, I doubt I would've even sat down to listen to Half-pint that night. The night before Carrie was up at 11:30pm till 2:30am with a horrible ear infection,  and Mr. Blue Eyes had woken up early at 4am till he finally went down at 7am...netting me two hours of sleep. I was exhausted, but I knew this was important because of my daughter's tone of voice. Her words drove home the importance of reading this book at this specific time in my life. Honestly, NMPK wasn't easy for me to read because I could see so many problems that I needed work on (maybe that's my perfectionist tendencies kicking in). We do math timings, handwriting books, and grammar exercises. I was unaware of what else was being taught.
           I would encourage you to pick up the book and find some practical solutions with me. If you pick up the No More Perfect Kids book (e-book or hard copy from any brick and mortar store or online retailer) anytime between March 13 (today!) – 23, 2014, you will be eligible to receive over $100 in free resources.

Here’s how it works:

1) Buy the No More Perfect Kids book between March 13 and March 23
2) Scan or take a picture of the receipt
3) email a copy of your receipt to freebies@nmpk-extras.com
4)Within 24 hours your will receipt a reply with a link and password to unlock you free resources!

Here’s what you’ll get:

4 Printables:

You’re Special Poster
I Corinthians 13 for Parents Poster
Compliments and Corrections Booklet by Dr. Kathy Koch
Conversation Starters for Parents and Grandparents Booklet by Dr. Kathy Koch

4 Hearts at Home Audio Workshops:

When You Feel Like Screaming–Sue Heimer
Getting Inside the Head of Your Kid–Shaunti Feldhahn
Raising Grateful Kids–Marianne Miller
Real Ways to Connect with Your Kids–Kathi Lipp​

3 E-Books:

A Perfect Pet for Peyton by Gary Chapman
How Am I Smart by Kathy Koch
The 10 Commandments of Parenting by Dr. Ed Young

There is also a free 13 day challenge to help motivate us to help our kids. I'll be signing up today. I need a daily challenge to get me started on the right foot. Half-pint and the rest of our children will thank us. Want to join me? Click here.

Let's use the next 13 days of bringing excellence into our homes and classrooms, and a lifetime of growing better as a parent.
          

Amo, Amas, Amat

           School began in our house this past Monday; and if you couldn't tell by the title of this post, our new coursework includes...Latin! I'm so excited to learn this along with my two oldest. I got a small dose of Latin when I studied medical terminology in college and I really loved learning it. I feel so smart understanding large medical words like hysteroslapingo-oophorectomy. Now we are learning fun phrases to use in everyday conversations like "Que me amat, amet et canem meum." (This means "Love me, love my dog"... we'll try this on our new neighbors.)
          I have two years of homeschooling under my belt, but we are adding a few new things into the mix for this year. First off, this is my first year teaching kindergarten.  I love my five year old's enthusiasm (and that color by number is educational for her...my older two enjoy calc-u-color) She runs to get up and make her bed in the morning. She has been waiting so long for school.This is also my first year repeating any material.  (It's a bit comforting to know what's coming up in third grade math).
              We are also planning on moving which makes a big impact on the rules concerning homeschooling. Although my hubby's job is in Kansas, it's located close enough to the border that we are actually looking at living in Missouri. Missouri's laws include a mandatory number of hours, and that you maintain documentation of it. You must complete 600 hours in the core subjects (400 must be at your primary residence), with a whopping 1,000 hours total. In Illinios, you are required to teach your children the equivalent of what they'd learn in public school, but they don't tell you how to do it. The new rules for our new state have left me with some questions: Since my kindergartener isn't seven yet (and school isn't compulsory till seven years of age in Missouri), do I need to do a thousand hours of school with her or just ensure that she learns everything a kindergartener should know?  Does anyone know if Latin counts toward language arts? How do foreign languages work? Do I have to stop my clock when we have recess and lunch? If you know these answers, I'd love your help!
            I've decided that these hour stipulations are going to give me more excuses to be creative in how I conduct school. We are doing more projects and other enrichment activities for history. Today the girls played a game of "Steal the Spanish Treasure" (think scaled-down game of risk meets checkers) after reading about the Spanish conquistadors and their mining of gold from South America. I'm also counting the time I read out loud "Little House in the Big Woods" to everyone,  and "A Princess of Mars" to the older two (some of Edward Rice Burroughs word send me to the dictionary).  I can't wait to try out some awesome field trips in our new location as well.
          My girls gave a little groan when they realized we were starting school a little earlier this year, but after the first day they all had grins on their faces. Even my nature loving girl decided her "Easy Grammar" was actually easy. It's going to be a great year not to merely scrape by, but to dig in, find new adventures, learn Latin, et cetera. (I've already learned that Latin has no soft "c" sound...so go try that last Latin word again.)

      If you have any advice about my questions, please fire away in the comments below. 

Pain In The Boot

        Many of you know that I recently purchased a amazing set of cowgirl boots, but what you don't know is that I'm on my second pair. The first set continued to make my toes tingle on one foot after wearing them for about an hour. (I'm pretty sure that is not normal!) After three days of trying to break them in, my foot began to feel sore instead of my boot feeling better. Why in the world was I fighting it? They were clearly too small. Well, I didn't want the hassle of returning them. However, Amazon is really amazing with returns...so with my hubby's help, we exchanged for a half size up. The new pair are wonderful, except for one thing: they still cut into my ankle when I walk in them. The only way to avoid this is to walk very stiffly and take large steps; and even then, it still hurts. I had the benefit of feeling the others stop hurting around my ankles (despite the tingling) after three days of "breaking them in". I knew it was just a matter of time. I'm sure a few people were giggling at my strange gait while I sauntered up and down the aisles at Wal-mart during grocery shopping. There was even a slight fear in the back of my mind that this pair might somehow never stop hurting. Today, I am happy to announce, is the first day that I was able to walk normally.
        Sometimes in life we have to keep on walking despite the pain, knowing that the pay-off will be worth it. Homeschooling our girls has been one of those things. I love it, but there have been some slightly painful things to go along with it. I've been working on getting the girls to write more over the past few months, but there have been a few bumps along the way...mainly, I've had to change my approach. While it seemed simple enough to have the girls start researching a topic they were interested in for writing a paper, it became apparent (especially with my 2nd grader) that this wasn't the best approach to getting them to write more. There was little progress...along with lots of frustration.  I had begun having them read from our history book independently and write a few sentences describing a section of the chapter (we use "Story of the World" which is written out like a story instead of a typical textbook). This caused almost daily tears for my 2nd grader. I couldn't understand the problem. My daughter won the young authors contest for our district when she just a Kindergartener. I knew she was a great writer. When I would ask her about what she read, she could easily tell me what happened...demonstrating comprehension. The snag was when she was writing it down. A friend of mine came over who recently stopped teaching at a private school to stay at home with her kids and begin homeschooling.
I asked her if she had any experience with what my second grader was going through. Thankfully,  she had some really great advice.  She introduced me to "Writing With Ease", and even loaned me her copy so I'd be able to try it out without investing in the books. The author contends that writing is a two step process that involves not only formulating your ideas in your mind, but also remembering it well and long enough to put it on paper. It made some sense given what I was experiencing; but when I tested my 2nd grader, I realized that this was  EXACTLY her problem. She is wonderfully bright, and completely capable of telling me her thoughts which I can easily write down. She was having a hard time writing down her thoughts at the same pace she was thinking them. This was a total light bulb moment and a huge relief to me! We started on the coursework at the level designed to help teach them how to do this (which happens to be the 2nd level), and I have seen just how bright and wonderful my daughter is. My fourth grader has continued on with her summaries for history, but for now my 2nd grader only reads them. Then, she verbally tells me what happened with great ease and zero tears. As we have gone along this new adventure, I have often learned that I have to change my technique. Copywork alone was not improving handwriting, so we introduced handwriting curriculum. There is nothing wrong with that.  Admitting to my 2nd grader that I shouldn't have been assigning what I was brought us both relief. It's ok to be wrong. This is part of the process for me to learn what parts of homeschooling are "chapping our hide", address them, and continue on. In the end, I'm grateful to know my child better and help her succeed.
        It feels just as good as my leather boots that are broken in...maybe even better.
       What have you been "breaking" in lately? I love hearing your comments!

The Pressure Cooker

        "Are you sure you want to homeschool this year when you're having a new baby?" We share a driveway and garage with a very near neighbor despite the fact that we live in the country on 10 acres; so before we signed anything, we went over to meet them to get a feel for how we all got along. They have been great neighbors, and I'll never forget the true concern in her voice when we talked about homeschooling. I think many people think it must be a nuisance to take on teaching our kids along with everything else a stay at home mom does, but I have found them to compliment each other nicely. Granted I spend several hours a day reading, teaching, and grading homework...but the perks are overwhelmingly in my favor.
        I've had a new little one while trying to get everyone out the door in time for the school. It doesn't matter if the baby (or I) just finally fell asleep after a rough night. I am forced to get everyone up. I've seen the tears from my daughter over how much she misses the baby, whereas now they can hold him while I read to them. I felt the stress of trying to keep enough uniforms clean or their reading log up to date. Yes, I had down time during the day;  but listening to a newborn scream on the way to pick up a sibling, left me more frazzled than I was before my "down time". Some of you may be wondering why I didn't just use the bus.
We didn't live in a neighborhood that I could use the bus without paying...and even then, I wouldn't necessarily relish the words a unsupervised 4th grader might be saying in front of my kindergartener.
        It has been great to spend time as a family for the past two weeks that we've taken off for our newest arrival. I love spending time eating a hot breakfast instead of spending time dropping off the girls. I love watching the girls get to know their brother. I don't know how long we will homeschool. I don't even know if we will next year, but I know that I'm so thankful to be able to this year! It takes me out of the pressure cooker of traditional school (even though there's still a little heat from the oven of our own goals for the girls).