A Natural Mother

          I look at our cat Tiger, and I'm awe...and a little jealous.  She's not even a year old, but she gave birth to eight amazing kittens last week. There was no midwife to hold her hand; although judging by the frantic exodus of the other cats when I opened the porch door, I'd say her fellow cats heard and saw zmore than they wanted. All day long she willing jumps into the box with the kittens and nurses them till they are happily asleep (there is no pediatrician advising her not to nurse them to sleep). Occasionally, I see her jump out for a cat nap in solitude, food, or water. I cannot imagine nursing that many little ones at once, let alone as new mom. Yet, she does it all effortlessly. She even purrs. There's not even a fellow parent to help her out. It makes me feel like a bit of a whiner. She makes motherhood look easy.  Motherhood is difficult and challenging for me, and anyone else who is honest.

            Of course, she never deals with switching out clothes for different seasons or preparing meals, or figuring out crazy things like which orthodontists to go to...or loses her credit card (I'm speaking from very recent experience). Her boy doesn't fall down stairs while attempting to escape the back porch and get hen-pecked on his eyelid after falling onto the hen, making him look like the perfect model for an article entitled "How to Fail at Keeping Your Child Supervised and Safe". She happily nurses for weeks till they grow up and start catching their own dinner or eating from the cat bowl...not for months or even years as the World Health Organization recommends for human babies. She feels no pressure to make decisions about schools or sports or budgets. She doesn't have to cut birds from her diet to because her kittens are sensitive to them. (I tried adding gluten back into Mr. Blue Eyes diet once again, only to have the phlegmy noise return to his breathing within twelve hours...Gracie immediately noticed he was "purring" again.) Life isn't all peaches for her though. She gave birth to eight, but one died shortly after it's birth. Another still had it's placenta attached and appeared to be dead because of it's failure to find her and start nursing. Thankfully,  Half-pint stroked the cool kitten and it moved enough to prove it still had a little bit of fight left (we cut the dried placenta the following day when Tiger still failed to remove it). It's a week later and it's impossible to tell that one apart from it's siblings. I guess we all need a little help from time to time. I found out this week that the verse our girl's had memorized for church this month is Galatians 6:9 which says, "So let's not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good. At the right time we will harvest a good crop if we don't give up, or quit." It's been a good reminder of the rewards of perseverance, as I've also cut up half a dozen ticks in the past couple of days. Keep on parenting, dear friends. It will be worth it in the end!

Building a Web

          "How long will it be till I find someone else that likes running?" I asked God this during my morning conversation, but it was more in resignation than a request.  With five kids, I have a hard time keeping my attention focused on a conversation with another adult long enough to know somebody beyond their name let alone their hobbies. I had talked about running with a kind soul at the original church we had attended when we first moved to Missouri (note that this was only possible because four of my five kids were in the children's church). For many reasons, we decided to check out another church a couple of months ago, leaving behind my running connection. I haven't found another nursing room there, let alone another nursing room buddy...but God is not deterred by minor things like my ideas of how something should happen.  A couple hours after that conversation with God, we were at the local library for story time. A mom that I had met the week before at the library started talking to me about running; and before I knew it, Mary and I signed up for our very first 5K (which'll be coming up in just a few weeks). I could easily imagine God chuckling at my surprise. That was really quick answer to pray.
            The thing that has been hardest about moving is leaving behind the support network of moms and families we had in Illinois.  In December,  I remember being sad that the children were still feeling disconnected from having real "friends". I felt a pang of responsibility and guilt. Maybe I made a mistake by continuing to homeschool them. It was hard to have priorities beyond school and unpacking for me this fall. I wanted to feel at home in our home before having people over, but there was a depressive gloom on our girl's faces, especially the older ones. What's a mom to do? Well, I said yes to every e-vite for the monthly homeschooler field trip. I also decided to join a homeschool co-op.  I've never been against co-ops. I just don't like to commit to someone else's schedule (and try to get everyone somewhere on time and prepared with homework and such). I like the flexibility of taking a week off anytime I want and being done as early as May. God heard my cry and protestations. I just happened to show up at AWANA early for pick-up, just happened to meet with a homeschooling mom who hooked me up with one of the founders of a wonderful co-op that has 12 week semester (thus relieving some of my issues with commitment). It has been one of the best experiences of my short teaching career. We've made friends and had playdates, besides being challenged to be a better teacher (like learning what sensory bins are and how to incorporate them...currently Mr. Blue Eyes loves his morning "sensory bin"--our dog's food tub).
           God hasn't stopped with helping me build my "web" of friends.  He's placed two other friends (that also happen to homeschool) in my path that have no connection to the co-op or library time or AWANA. Both of them have their own areas of expertise,  and I've really loved getting to know them better. Sometimes it's hard for me to wait for God's answer to my prayers.  Sometimes I am tempted to think He isn't listening at all, but looking back I am grateful for the timing. Do you really appreciate something unless you truly feel the loss? When I recently read the account of a cripple being healed by Peter and John in Acts 3-4, I was suprised when I read Acts 4:22. It says, "For the man on whom this sign (miracle) of healing was performed was more than forty years old." I wondered what it would feel like to wait more than forty years for my answer to come. He'd been crippled since birth (Acts 3:2). Surely his mom prayed for healing while she cradled him in her arms for the first time or when she realized that he was different from the other children. I imagine his mother was truly grateful for his healing after watching him struggle for so long. The crippled man must have felt happy as well.
            A friend recently asked how I knew different people and had found some connections for various homeschool opportunities after just living here since September.  Later, I realized it was because God had blessed me with placing people right where I could meet them. That's truly an answer to my prayers and an answer to many of your prayers that have come alongside me in the past few months. I was so thankful for all of you who contacted me after my posting about our sickness, offering to pray for us. It connected me to you. It prompted me to start asking others how I could pray for them, which connected me to them. Today, I'm so thankful for the web of support and especially for the One who built it for me.

Pain In The Boot

        Many of you know that I recently purchased a amazing set of cowgirl boots, but what you don't know is that I'm on my second pair. The first set continued to make my toes tingle on one foot after wearing them for about an hour. (I'm pretty sure that is not normal!) After three days of trying to break them in, my foot began to feel sore instead of my boot feeling better. Why in the world was I fighting it? They were clearly too small. Well, I didn't want the hassle of returning them. However, Amazon is really amazing with returns...so with my hubby's help, we exchanged for a half size up. The new pair are wonderful, except for one thing: they still cut into my ankle when I walk in them. The only way to avoid this is to walk very stiffly and take large steps; and even then, it still hurts. I had the benefit of feeling the others stop hurting around my ankles (despite the tingling) after three days of "breaking them in". I knew it was just a matter of time. I'm sure a few people were giggling at my strange gait while I sauntered up and down the aisles at Wal-mart during grocery shopping. There was even a slight fear in the back of my mind that this pair might somehow never stop hurting. Today, I am happy to announce, is the first day that I was able to walk normally.
        Sometimes in life we have to keep on walking despite the pain, knowing that the pay-off will be worth it. Homeschooling our girls has been one of those things. I love it, but there have been some slightly painful things to go along with it. I've been working on getting the girls to write more over the past few months, but there have been a few bumps along the way...mainly, I've had to change my approach. While it seemed simple enough to have the girls start researching a topic they were interested in for writing a paper, it became apparent (especially with my 2nd grader) that this wasn't the best approach to getting them to write more. There was little progress...along with lots of frustration.  I had begun having them read from our history book independently and write a few sentences describing a section of the chapter (we use "Story of the World" which is written out like a story instead of a typical textbook). This caused almost daily tears for my 2nd grader. I couldn't understand the problem. My daughter won the young authors contest for our district when she just a Kindergartener. I knew she was a great writer. When I would ask her about what she read, she could easily tell me what happened...demonstrating comprehension. The snag was when she was writing it down. A friend of mine came over who recently stopped teaching at a private school to stay at home with her kids and begin homeschooling.
I asked her if she had any experience with what my second grader was going through. Thankfully,  she had some really great advice.  She introduced me to "Writing With Ease", and even loaned me her copy so I'd be able to try it out without investing in the books. The author contends that writing is a two step process that involves not only formulating your ideas in your mind, but also remembering it well and long enough to put it on paper. It made some sense given what I was experiencing; but when I tested my 2nd grader, I realized that this was  EXACTLY her problem. She is wonderfully bright, and completely capable of telling me her thoughts which I can easily write down. She was having a hard time writing down her thoughts at the same pace she was thinking them. This was a total light bulb moment and a huge relief to me! We started on the coursework at the level designed to help teach them how to do this (which happens to be the 2nd level), and I have seen just how bright and wonderful my daughter is. My fourth grader has continued on with her summaries for history, but for now my 2nd grader only reads them. Then, she verbally tells me what happened with great ease and zero tears. As we have gone along this new adventure, I have often learned that I have to change my technique. Copywork alone was not improving handwriting, so we introduced handwriting curriculum. There is nothing wrong with that.  Admitting to my 2nd grader that I shouldn't have been assigning what I was brought us both relief. It's ok to be wrong. This is part of the process for me to learn what parts of homeschooling are "chapping our hide", address them, and continue on. In the end, I'm grateful to know my child better and help her succeed.
        It feels just as good as my leather boots that are broken in...maybe even better.
       What have you been "breaking" in lately? I love hearing your comments!